Reset Button

So, here I am living in a new house in a new city, part of a new community and a new church, starting a new career at a new job. It seems that the reset button has been pressed on my life. All of these things are significant changes from my life with Paula. Most of the time I am confident that I have made good decisions, decisions that are in line with the trajectory of my life with Paula. Other times, I wonder if there have been too many changes and that life now is too different from life with Paula. This new life promises to be good, but seems so disconnected from my previous life. Often it seems like I have lived two different lives: life-before-Paula and life-after-Paula. Sometimes it feels that there have been two different persons: Darren-with-Paula and Darren-without-Paula. There is a living link between these two lives - Micah. However a ten-month-old baby is a very different person than a two-and-a-half year-old boy. I think this discontinuity is unavoidable and there's really not much I can do about it. How could life ever remain the same when a person you love so much dies?